“I’m very picky with whom I give my energy to. I prefer to reserve my time, intensity, and spirit exclusively to those who reflect sincerity.” ~ Dau Voire
Introverts are quiet, thoughtful, and reserved people. And unlike their extroverted counterparts, they don’t especially enjoy talking to a whole lot of people. They approach the world while consulting their rich inner world - and with their relatively low energy reserves, they don’t just go around talking to people willy-nilly. They are highly selective of who they spend their time with. And once the right people show up, introverts go all-in and foster the relationship to the best of their abilities.
In this article, we’ll look at 7 reasons why introverts make the greatest friends.
1) They are loyal
If you manage to befriend an introvert, you might as well win yourself a pal for life. Introverts can be terribly picky over who they associate themselves with. It’s not easy for an introvert to open up, especially with their aversion to compulsively verbalizing everything they think. If an introvert finds your presence comforting rather than draining, they’d no doubt stick with you through any hardships. So if you have an introverted friend, you got yourself a real one through and through.
2) They are great listeners
Laurie Helgoe, psychologist and the author of the book “Introvert Power”, once said this: “Introvert conversations are like jazz. Each player gets to solo for a nice stretch before the other player comes in and does his solo.” Does that quote resonate well with you?
Since the natural state of most introverts is mostly dwelling in their rich inner minds, they tend to be contemplative and reflective. Introverts are the type of friends that give you a lending ear. Extroverts who talk their mouths off and introverts who enjoy the witty banter make for quite a formidable duo. On the other hand, introverts who only stick with other introverts are also very respectful and calm listeners.
Introverts can be highly empathetic individuals who understand the nuances of when to speak and when to listen. When an introvert’s friend is feeling depressed, the introvert is a perfect companion to help them during these troubling times.
3) They are empathetic
For every introvert that is data-driven and analytical, there are more introverts are that are highly compassionate and empathetic. The author of The Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), Dr. Elaine Aron estimated that 70% of highly sensitive people are introverts. And that’s an astonishingly high number considering that only around 25%-40% of the world are introverts.
Contrary to popular stereotypes, many introverted feeling types are people-oriented. This means that despite their mild-mannered nature, they do enjoy being around a select number of people. These introverts tend to be very observant, caring, emotional, and receptive towards others - even to strangers and acquaintances. In addition to this, they process things very deeply and can notice many connections that other types wouldn’t normally know. So if you’re looking for a friend that you can form a long-lasting, emotional bond - consider the empathetic introvert.
4) They seek for their own fun
If you want to step out from the party scene, an introvert would already be one step ahead of you. An introvert is always ready to do activities that have meaning attached to them. This includes going to a historical museum, going on a long-night car ride, or relaxing at a coffee spot. For introverts, being able to enrich their mind with new perspectives while not being bombarded by constant stimulation is amazing.
So if what you’re looking for is a constant date buddy for your interesting escapade - look no further! An introverted friend will be more than happy to go as long as they’re in good company.
5) They love one-on-one relationships
“I want to be alone… with someone else who wants to be alone.” – Dimitri Zaik.
Before you think otherwise, no, the header is not meant to insinuate that extroverts are polygamous. In terms of friendships, introverts vastly prefer quality over quantity. Unlike extroverts who thrive in groups or even conversations with people they may have just met, introverts see relationships differently.
A close-knit group of 2-3 friends for an introvert is plenty enough to keep them satisfied. If an introvert spreads themselves too thin and interacts with too many people, they can easily feel drained afterward. If you invite an introvert to a party with plenty of new faces, they tend to be more apprehensive about it. On the other hand, if you invite an introvert to a weekly board game meet up or catch up with coffee with one close friend, they would happily oblige.
6) They are not superficial
“[Introverts] listen more than they talk, think before they speak, and often feel as if they express themselves better in writing than in conversation. They tend to dislike conflict. Many have a horror for small talk but enjoy deep discussions.” - Susan Cain, author of the 2012 non-fiction book, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking.
If you expect an introvert to enjoy a conversation about the weather, you’d be terribly mistaken. Introverts view surface-level topics like the weather or sports as a complete chore to participate in. They are more interested in connecting deeply with others, especially people who have proven their worth to them. Once someone has ignited the soul of an introvert, they will invest their time and energy into being the best friend they can be, making it all worth it.
7) They always make time for you
Since introverts devote their attention to only a select few, they can easily make time for you to hang out. And when an introvert chooses to spend their precious time with you instead of relaxing by themselves at home - that’s when you know you are in a healthy relationship with them! You can always count on an introvert to be there for you anytime.